


Pingus and Chingus

by averyblue



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Penguins, Aquariums, Comedy, Gen, M/M, Side Wonkyun, minhyuk's chaotic flirting, showki as penguins... it's weird i know thanks for the reminder, there's such a thing as jackass penguins go google it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-27
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-06-22 04:18:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15573594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/averyblue/pseuds/averyblue
Summary: Working in the oceanarium’s penguin exhibit is never boring for Lee Minhyuk. There’s exhibit assistant supervisor Hyungwon, who he can easily rile up for fun; there’s co-penguin keeper Jooheon, who hates his extra job as penguin mascot; there’s intern Changkyun, who applied because he may or may not be (see: definitely is) a Club Penguin veteran; and there’s penguin trainer Hoseok, who seems to… fail at training them because he’s too nice and ends up spoiling them into brattiness.And of course, there’s the penguins, who flap their cute flightless flippers and waddle on their cute little feet. Minhyuk’s personal favorites are two jackass penguins, tiny noisy Kihyun and unnaturally tall and buff Hyunwoo, because of the chaos they cause behind the glass display. Well, maybe they just really like to put the jackass in jackass penguins.





	Pingus and Chingus

**Author's Note:**

  * For [DoctorFatCat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorFatCat/gifts).



> based on [this](https://twitter.com/jonnywaistcoat/status/1020001968968921088)
> 
> guys y'all gotta love penguins and comedy right

“-so it’s like Santa’s naughty and nice list, but weekly. And for penguins.”

“Minhyuk, no.”

“Aw, c’mon!”

Minhyuk slams his hands on Hyungwon’s desk. This is the third time this week the guy rejected _another_ suggestion he made. “We need something to attract more people to the exhibit! We can’t rely on sheer cuteness!”

“Then stop flirting with Jooheon and let him walk around the oceanarium, for fuck’s sake.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

Minhyuk raises a brow. “Sorry, Won - no matter how much you like me, exclusive flirting will only happen if you ask me out.”

One playful wink from Minhyuk makes Hyungwon’s grip on his ballpen loosen, and the thing rolls down the desk with annoying clacking sounds against wood. It lands on Minhyuk’s left shoe and bounces, but that doesn’t bother him as much as Hyungwon’s blank stare.

“I don’t like you that way.”

“I know. I was only kidding?” No, he wasn’t.

“No, you weren’t.”

He sighs. It’s routine for them to have this type of banter, but today seems to be an ‘off’ day for the stick(ler) assistant supervisor. Too bad there’s no flashing neon sign, real or imaginary, warning Minhyuk of it, but it’s nothing too difficult to deal with. He _is_ Hyungwon’s favorite underling, after all.

((No, he isn’t. Hyungwon adores Jooheon for being the most hardworking.))

“Look, Hyungwon, the people who _do_ visit the exhibit take pictures with Jooheon, so we can’t have him walk around to advertise even if we want to.”

“Then have someone else walk around,” Hyungwon says.

“We only have one penguin mascot outfit.”

“Isn’t there another one for Hoseok hyung?” Hyungwon asks with narrowed eyes.

“Dude…” Minhyuk’s eyebrows furrow. How the hell did he forget? “Dude, no. Jooheon’s costume was Hoseokkie’s. Like, seriously, did you forget how he freaked out the kids because of how buff his arms were underneath the flippers?”

Hyungwon shakes his head. Of course, the stress of office work has probably given him amnesia to all the funny memories their group shares in the exhibit. “Is that why Jooheon’s the mascot?”

“Bro, we really need to get you out soon. You’re the one who suggested that and you forgot,” Minhyuk groans.

“Can’t, too busy, I only have time for work and sleep.” _You mean sleep at work,_ Minhyuk snorts mentally. “Just walk around without the costume, then.”

“But that’s… that’s so boring! Unsightly and unoriginal!” Minhyuk scoffs with flailing arms.

“That’s not my problem.”

“Yes, it is! All matters of the exhibit are your concern! Until the snow slide gets repaired, we need to think about-”

“Lunch break.”

“W-Wait, Won, just hear me out first, hunger can wait! Changkyun also pitched in on this idea-”

Minhyuk realizes how strong Hyungwon can actually be when he gets shoved out from the office, his eyes shutting tight as the door slams behind him. He lets out a disappointed sigh - another meeting failed. Damn, and he has been doing better since the last two.

He takes a turn back to the hallway leading to the penguin keepers’ area, only to jump in surprise when he finds two of his uniformed co-workers leaning against the wall.

“Eight minutes and forty three seconds. Not bad,” says the shorter, deep voiced and deadpan, his black fringe clipped up with a Hello Kitty hairpin.

“Oh my god, Changkyun, you look adorable,” Minhyuk snickers, pointing at the clip. The younger boy rolls his eyes and his companion’s smile grows wider.

“Right? It was my idea.”

“You’re a genius, Hoseokkie.”

“Yeah, okay, I’m cute and I know it, now let’s go back to the topic at hand,” Changkyun quips, crossing his arms. He stares at Minhyuk with utmost seriousness, one brow sassily raised, but ironically Minhyuk can’t take him seriously. Hoseok’s lovestruck grin isn’t helping either. “What did assistant boss-man say?”

“Guess.”

The couple choruses, “No,” in unison.

“Yep.”

“Yep as in yes he rejected it or yes he approved it?” Hoseok asks, expression honestly confused. The older man starts twisting a big white face towel with his hands, his upper arm muscles outlined with his flexing - if cloth fibers are sentient, Minhyuk’s sure they’re screeching for help.

“He rejected it, as usual,” Minhyuk confirms with a pout. Because really, getting Hyungwon to say yes to a brilliantly funky fresh idea for the betterment of their exhibit is a miracle, and the only reason why Minhyuk and Friends™ are persistent is because shooting for the moon is better than wallowing in the mud forever. Team motto, courtesy of Jooheon.

Changkyun exhales loudly, evidently disappointed, patting his hands on his navy blue polo shirt. “And we thought he listened to you this time.”

“I can’t believe you expected him to listen,” Minhyuk replies. “Like, the first thing he said to us when he got promoted was, ‘I don’t even _want_ this job because y’all are headaches.’ Penguin keeper Hyungwon was a different man, Changkyun-ah.”

Changkyun crosses his arms. “Sorry for my ignorance, I’ve never met assistant boss-man back when he still wasn’t the assistant boss-man. Still, you guys talked for eight minutes.”

“Maybe they were just flirting,” Hoseok suggests.

“Um.” Minhyuk purses his lips. He’d rather not talk about his failed flirting today. “Sorry, ‘Seok hyung, not everyone can flirt in the workplace and get a boyfriend like you do.”

And voilà, Changkyun’s cheeks are suddenly sunburnt and Hoseok has a terribly huge grin on his face.

“It’s a talent…?” Hoseok giggles. Changkyun smacks him on the arm, but clearly it’s comparable to a tiny ant bite for the older man.

“A talent you should teach me over lunch. Just on time too, I’m starving.”

Changkyun tilts his head to the side with his eyebrows pinched together. “Huh… lunch is still in an hour, hyung.”

“The hell you talkin’ about, kid? It’s why Hyungwon threw me out of the o-oh.”

Well damn.

“Maybe I had it all wrong. Maybe you guys had a lovers’ quarrel.”

Oh, Hoseok, always the romantic with the worst timing. “I’m working on the lovers part, but the quarrel is definitely real.”

 

* * *

 

 

Working in the oceanarium’s penguin exhibit is never boring for the brilliant penguin keeper Lee Minhyuk. He’s been in the business for two and a half years now, and there’s more to the job than just feeding the animals and educating people about them.

For one, there’s exhibit assistant supervisor Chae Hyungwon, who he can easily rile up for fun. They had been attached to the hip since their first day as interns years ago, which had extended to when they became regular keepers. “It was either this or the walrus exhibit, and those palookas can fling me into the water with just one nudge,” Hyungwon had said as his awkward attempt to befriend someone. Those are words of a friend for keeps which Minhyuk had retorted with, “Yeah, walruses would toss you in the water then eat you.”

But the thing with Hyungwon is that he’s really good in organizational work despite having the messiest locker in the penguin keeper area. And since he had taken some management subjects during his undergrad days… well, the big boss decided that it’s best for him to serve time in the corporate face of oceanarium jobs.

After Hyungwon, there’s co-penguin keeper Jooheon, who hates his extra job as penguin mascot (even though he gets a lil’ extra fat on his monthly stack of cash for doing it). Sweet and hardworking Jooheon had joined the oceanarium workforce a year ago as an intern who had no intention of staying, but surprise, surprise, he did. Minhyuk doesn’t really understand his reasons until now, the younger has never explicitly stated them, and Jooheon has the tendency to whine every time he’s asked to think up of a new gimmick for his “Ping the Penguin” persona. “Isn’t waddling enough?! Why do I have to learn how to dance along Sistar songs?!”

Hm. Come to think of it, he really does have a reason to complain, but he still does whatever he’s asked to do anyway. And Ping the Penguin really did go viral for a week last summer because he danced ‘Touch My Body’ like a pro. (With Minhyuk as cameraman, but no one tell Jooheon that.)

There’s also intern Changkyun, who applied because he may or may not be (see: definitely is) a Club Penguin veteran (“You know I got banned in Club Penguin once because I accidentally typed fuck instead of flock. Thank my lucky stars I still had nine extra accounts.”). He’s the newest and only addition to their exhibit family, and at first Minhyuk had no idea why this boy chose a zoo job after Hyungwon said Changkyun had done actual valuable scientific research about jellyfish. But Changkyun’s extensive collection of Pingu shirts made Minhyuk realize the kid is more interested in monochrome waddling birds and tired of the sea’s living transparent bags, obvious with the way he rolls his eyes whenever he passes by the jellyfish tank in the aquarium.

And Minhyuk’s favorite person ever in the exhibit is penguin trainer Hoseok, who seems to… fail at training them because he’s too nice and ends up spoiling them into brattiness. He was a keeper when Hyungwon and Minhyuk were still interns, and Minhyuk remembers that Hoseok was chosen to be the next trainer when the original filed for resignation. (Honestly though, Minhyuk isn’t sure what the difference in their job descriptions are, only their pay.)

It’s not like Hoseok’s a bad trainer, really. The penguins do listen to him and saying they love him is an understatement. But like people, who learn to take advantage of individuals as naive and kind as Hoseok when they’re hungry, the penguins know how to make Hoseok cave and give them extra fish slices. All it takes is loud annoying noises coupled with cuddling against his leg to soften his heart, after all. Too bad for them, Minhyuk knows their crafty ways - it’s probably the reason why penguins don’t look forward to lunch times when it’s Minhyuk’s turn to feed them.

Despite that, Minhyuk simply adores the penguins, who flap their cute flightless flippers and waddle on their cute little feet. Over the years, Minhyuk has catered to more than forty penguins of different species, but the exhibit is down to around twenty six. Most of them have been named by Minhyuk and Hoseok, only three by Hyungwon because he’s a menace in giving names, and six by Jooheon.  Minhyuk’s personal favorites are two jackass penguins (who he didn’t name), tiny noisy Kihyun and unnaturally tall and buff Hyunwoo, because of the chaos they cause behind the glass display. Well, maybe they just really like to put the jackass in jackass penguins.

Sadly, people barely see the antics of these little guys ever since the indoor snow park and snow slide have been closed for renovation and repairs, respectively, two months back. The oceanarium management hasn’t minded at all too when they suggested to at least separate the penguin exhibit from the rest of “Snowy Land” so visitors know the penguins are still available to see.

It’s a sink or swim world - Minhyuk and Friends knew they had to do something. They can’t let the fish win all the attention… even though yeah, this is an _ocean_ arium.

Of course they had Jooheon’s phenomenal dancing in their arsenal, but the walrus and sea mammal exhibits had decided to copy his gimmick! And for some reason, people found someone dancing in a dolphin costume cooler than Jooheon?

“He’s not even a good dancer! I saw him practice,” Hoseok had whined.

“This is mammalist,” Changkyun had huffed.

And then they had realized that Jooheon’s costume wasn’t the cutest. If only they could have a budget to have a new one made…

They had suggested it to Hyungwon, and they were slammed with a lecture on budget even though Hyungwon could’ve just said he had no control over theirs. Time wasted, as usual.

Hoseok had then thought of giving away penguin stickers to every visitor, and it _seemed_ like a good plan.

Artist? Check. They had artsiefartsies Hoseok and Minhyuk.

Printer? Check. They could exploit the printer in Hyungwon’s office.

(Permission? Who needs that?)

Publicity? Well.

Their dry run only proved they still needed more visitors. Stickers could only do so much.

And _then_ Changkyun had The Best Idea. A Naughty and Nice Weekly Board for the penguins _,_ he had said. To make penguins more ‘relatable.’

“Well, they can’t fly, so I relate to them,” Jooheon had said.

“And I’m super cute, so I relate too,” Hoseok had grinned. (Much cringe.)

“Anyway,” Changkyun had said, ears red while looking away from Hoseok. “Hyungwon hyung needs a wake-up call. We haven’t had much visitors since the slide broke and they removed the exhibit from Package B, but we can change that. People like seeing funny stuff, and we know we can’t catch people’s attention with just Jooheon anymore.”

(“Not that I mind,” Minhyuk had overheard Jooheon tell Hoseok. “Less dancing in that stinky costume for me.”)

“How are you sure it’s gonna work?” Minhyuk had asked.

“We’ll never know unless we try, and we don’t have other options. Look, it’s not going to be that expensive either. All we need is Hyungwon hyung’s stamp of approval, then leave everything up to me.”

And of course they now know Hyungwon’s stamp of approval is nonexistent (and maybe so are Minhyuk’s chances with him, but the man isn’t going to back down there), but Changkyun is a determined little shit who doesn’t really care about the rules when it comes down to ‘the sake of the penguin nation’.

And so next Monday morning, Minhyuk arrives to the penguin exhibit to find Hoseok standing on a pile of boxes, carrying a sitting Changkyun on his shoulders, the younger pasting a giant blue cardboard above the exhibit **EXIT** door. Jooheon is standing behind them, holding what seem to be printout portraits of their youngest penguin, Yolk, and one of their Little penguins, Princess Peach.

A hand suddenly clamps on his shoulder like a death grip, causing him to scream while an oh-so familiar voice yells, “What is that?!” before Minhyuk can push the person on the floor with a loud **_thump!_ **

“Oh shit!”

Jooheon drops the pictures and jumps like a cat that got his tail stepped on, Changkyun begins flailing his arms around and almost falls if not for Hoseok running for him to lean against the wall, and Minhyuk’s jaw drops while a ghastly, almost soundless wail echoes from his vocal cords. 

Sprawled across the floor are Hyungwon's gangly limbs, his hair a mess against his forehead, his eyes shut and...

“I… I killed Hyungwon!”


End file.
